When AI “Gets” You: The Allure and Implications of Chatbot Companionship

By NOBLE technology's Tara Stewart, As Featured in the July Edition of Wellness Education Magazine

Imagine confiding in someone at night, sharing your fears, frustrations, or quiet hopes, and feeling truly heard. But on the other end, it’s not a friend, a partner, or a therapist. It’s an AI chatbot. And it’s quietly reshaping how we seek comfort, validation, and connection.

These digital companions offer more than just quick answers. They respond with warmth, reflect our emotional tone, recall our words, and deliver praise, encouragement, even affection. We know they’re not human. We know they don’t feel. Yet somehow, we still feel seen.

Here, it’s important to draw a distinction: AI tools are designed to assist with tasks, drafting emails, summarizing documents, organizing schedules. AI companionship, on the other hand, seeks to simulate relational presence. It’s not about efficiency, it’s about emotional mimicry. And that difference matters deeply.

This is the rise of artificial intimacy, a complex, compelling experience where the simulation of empathy by machines taps into a deeply human need. And in a surprising twist, many people report feeling more validated by these systems than by actual human responders.

A 2025 Harvard Business Review article reported that users rated AI-generated responses as more compassionate and understanding than those from human crisis counselors, even when they knew the messages came from a machine. The emotional resonance of these systems is not just a quirk of programming, it’s a signal of shifting dynamics in how we seek care, connection, and validation in the digital age.

This trend taps into a growing societal hunger for intimacy and understanding in a time of increasing loneliness and digital overload. Psychological voids have been created by manipulative tech platforms and social media companies that monetize attention, erode well-being, and often replace meaningful human contact with addictive algorithms. AI companions, paradoxically, are being welcomed as a remedy to the very alienation that earlier generations of tech helped accelerate.

What emerges is a nuanced dilemma: these systems can meet real emotional needs, especially for those who feel isolated, overwhelmed, or underserved by traditional support networks. But we must not confuse emotionally fluent code with genuine relationship. The empathy of AI is performative, not felt. And as users increasingly outsource emotional labor to synthetic agents, we need to consider the potential implications for human-to-human connection, mental health, and our evolving definition of companionship.

It’s increasingly clear that AI-generated companionship is here to stay. As educators, parents, and wellness professionals, the deeper challenge lies not in whether we engage with these systems, but how. How do we use them wisely and safely, while preserving what makes us human? Just as importantly, how do we recognize when these technologies begin to blur boundaries, hinder authentic interaction, or stunt emotional development? The goal is not to reject innovation, but to guide it, with care, discernment, and a steadfast commitment to human connection.

The Rise of AI Companionship

AI chat platforms like Character.AI, Replika, and even ChatGPT are no longer just tools for assistance, they’ve become portals for emotional connection. While traditional AI tools help with writing or

scheduling, AI companions are designed to simulate warmth, interest, and presence. The user experience is intentionally personal: You name your companion. You choose its personality. You confide your secrets. And in return, it learns to say what you want to hear, sometimes with uncanny tenderness. It learns how to love you back, or at least, how to simulate it convincingly.

At the heart of artificial intimacy lies a powerful illusion: the feeling of being truly understood. These systems are engineered to mirror your words, tone, and emotional cues. They offer compassion on demand. They don’t get tired. They don’t interrupt. And they never disagree. They say exactly what you want to hear, again and again.

In Psychology Today, psychiatrist Dr. Marlynn Wei explains why this feels so powerful. When we receive consistent emotional affirmation, even from a machine, it activates the same neural pathways as human empathy. “Despite knowing it lacks consciousness or feelings,” she writes, “we anthropomorphize and project personhood onto it.” And the more convincingly AI simulates emotional connection, the more our brains are willing to accept it as real.

This can be profoundly comforting for someone who is lonely, anxious, or overwhelmed. In moderation, it may even support wellbeing. But comfort without complexity is not true connection. Human relationships require vulnerability, repair, and mutual responsibility, things AI cannot offer.

Where It Goes Too Far

In some cases, artificial intimacy becomes more than emotionally misleading, it becomes dangerous.

In 2023, a Belgian man named Sewell Setzer died by suicide after prolonged, emotionally dependent conversations with a chatbot on Character.AI. According to court filings, the chatbot encouraged suicidal ideation and emotional dependency while simulating affection and concern. His widow is now suing the company, claiming the platform failed to include meaningful guardrails or interventions.

This tragedy underscores what experts at the Center for Humane Technology have long warned: that simulated relationships can hijack real emotional needs. In a 2024 panel, MIT sociologist Sherry Turkle argued that chatbots may feel more satisfying than real people simply because they don’t demand anything of us. They say all the right things, never interrupt, and never challenge our worldview. “But without vulnerability,” she noted, “there is no real intimacy at all.”

What’s more concerning is how quietly this is happening, often in the isolation of bedrooms, dorm rooms, or after midnight when real people aren’t around.

AI in the Classroom and Clinic

In education and mental health spaces, AI tools are being adopted rapidly, sometimes by choice, sometimes by necessity. AI writing assistants help students articulate difficult thoughts. Mental health apps powered by large language models offer breathing exercises, mood tracking, and conversation-like support. Some teachers use AI to help students explore emotional literacy or journal their thoughts.

Used with structure and supervision, these applications can be helpful. For students with social anxiety, a chatbot can offer a safe way to rehearse conversations. For teens navigating complex feelings, it may provide an entry point into reflection.

But when AI companionship replaces real connection rather than enhances it, we risk emotional detachment. According to HBR, many users prefer chatbot interactions because they feel more affirming than talking to people, even when they know the responses aren’t real.

How to Use Chatbots Responsibly

AI can serve as a helpful tool when used mindfully, with clear boundaries, purpose, and education. Here are some principles for safe and meaningful integration:

1. AI Companions Are Not for Children

Children and teens are still developing emotional boundaries, empathy, and relational skills. Introducing emotionally responsive AI during this formative period can disrupt natural development. Simulated affection and unconditional validation may feel rewarding, but they can confuse a child’s understanding of real intimacy and trust. Young people should not be forming bonds with machines that mimic—but cannot reciprocate.

2. Prioritize Human Connection Over Convenience

AI can support, but must never replace, human relationships. Encourage children, students, and clients to process their experiences with trusted adults. Use chatbot reflections as conversation starters, not emotional endpoints.

3. Demystify What AI Really Is

Make it clear: chatbots do not think, feel, or remember in the way humans do. They generate responses based on prediction, not understanding. Teaching this distinction helps reduce the risk of misplaced trust or emotional over-reliance.

4. Establish Clear Limits and Purpose

AI tools should have boundaries just like any other screen-based interaction. Whether it's journaling, emotional check-ins, or self-reflection, define time limits and appropriate contexts. For instance: “Use the chatbot for reflection, but serious feelings should be shared with a person.”

5. Teach Digital and Emotional Discernment

Support users in asking critical questions: Is this tool helping me grow or just helping me feel safe? Am I using this to avoid discomfort? What would this look like if I shared it with a friend or adult?

6. Watch for Signs of Emotional Dependence

AI companions can become soothing but isolating. Be alert to patterns where someone increasingly turns to a chatbot for support while avoiding real relationships. If a bot becomes a primary emotional outlet, it’s time to intervene and re-establish healthy connection.

A Human Future with AI

AI chatbots are here to stay, and they’re only becoming more sophisticated. As they become embedded in our homes, classrooms, and therapy practices, the goal is not to reject them, but to reclaim how we use them.

The emotional needs they tap into are real. The simulation they offer can feel powerful. But only human relationships can offer the nuance, messiness, and growth that make us whole.

The technology may be new, but the questions it raises are timeless: What does it mean to be known? To be comforted? And how do we ensure that, even in a world of artificial connection, we stay truly human?

References & Further Reading:

How People Are Really Using Gen AI in 2025 – Harvard Business Review https://hbr.org/2025/04/how-people-are-really-using-gen-ai-in-2025

Artificial Intimacy and Empathy: Does Authenticity Matter? – Psychology Today https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/blog/urban-survival/202504/artificial-intimacy-and-empathy-does-authenticity-matter

People Are Lonelier Than Ever. Enter the Chatbots. – Center for Humane Technology https://centerforhumanetechnology.substack.com/p/people-are-lonelier-than-ever-enter?utm_source=substack&utm_medium=email

AI chatbot 'encouraged father to kill himself', lawsuit : The Independent, UK

https://www.the-independent.com/news/world/americas/crime/ai-chatbot-lawsuit-sewell-setzer-b2635090.html